Mother’s Day for the Grieving

I recently came across a friend requesting prayers for a family in her community. When asked about what happened she shared the news that the family’s oldest child, a 5 year old boy, had died the day before.

As I read through the shock wave of reactions and felt my own sorrow and nausea overwhelm me, and then I realized that Mother’s Day was just 8 days away for this poor mother. While she has 2 other children who will wish her a “Happy Mother’s Day” there will be a horrible emptiness where that other sweet little voice should be.

Photo Courtesy of ©iStockphoto.com/AnthonyRosenberg

Photo Courtesy of ©iStockphoto.com/AnthonyRosenberg

I’ve heard from many moms sharing in support group settings (if they lost their only child) how they still feel like a mom – that’s because they still are a mom. The absence of the child doesn’t change the identity of the parent – once a mom, always a mom. It’s the same when a parent dies, we don’t cease being sons or daughters, the connection doesn’t disappear even though it can feel like it does.

I feel that this blog has a responsibility to hear the voices of those who find Mother’s Day painful. This blog is dedicated to those who have lost a mother or a child, to those who have suffered through years of infertility and to those who’s mother-child relationships are strained and painful.

Mother’s Day isn’t always easy to celebrate, but it is good. It’s good to remember, to revisit times of hope, of freedom from worry, perhaps the days of our youths when “Mom” was a heavenly word that promised a bandaid for that cut knee or a hug after a hard day.

I am reminded of a story I heard recently from Doug Manning, a new friend of mine. He writes about woman in his congregation who’s 18 month old child died unexpectedly of what seemed like a normal case of the croup. Doug writes,

“I have always thought she was brilliance under pressure. Her statement was a flash of insight in a time of darkness – a flash of insight which ultimately changed my career and my life . . .

The young mother was crying hysterically. It is strange that we cannot allow tears. Nothing is more natural than to cry. Nothing gets as quick a reaction from us as someone crying out of control Everyone there that night began to react:

“There, there – now get a hold of yourself.”

“You can’t carry on like this.”

“Come on now – stop crying.”

Suddenly she stopped, stepped back, looked at them and said,

“Don’t take my grief from me. I deserve it. I am going to have it.”

I hope this philosophy can be a part, as you need it to be, of your Mother’s Day and a part of your life. If you need the day, a few hours, 10 minutes to have your grief, have it. Take it, you deserve it.

Photo Courtesy of Pinterest

Photo Courtesy of Pinterest

I also want to encourage you to tell stories, relive happier times, and find pieces of happiness to hold on to. Maybe even make time to honor those you are missing with some practices you can share with others.

As you are gathered together with your family, propose a toast to your loved one, share a memory you treasure about them and invite others to share their memories as well. The conversation may eventually move off topic, but stories will be shared, the name of your loved one will be heard, and you will be reminded of the precious fact that they haven’t been forgotten. They existed.

Wishing all of you, a meaningful Mother’s Day.

*to learn more about Doug’s story, read his book Don’t Take My Grief Away From Me

|| what do you think?

– Have you ever had a Mother’s Day that was unlike any other? Changed by a loss or broken relationship?

– What ways have you remembered those people that are missing from your family gathering?

– What do you think about Doug’s story? Have you ever felt like that poor mother?

 

 

Molly Keating

About Molly Keating

Hi, I'm Molly and I write for the blog here at O'Connor. I grew up in a mortuary with a mortician for a father who's deep respect for the profession inspired me to give working at a mortuary a try. Work at O'Connor has brought together two of my deep passions, writing & grief awareness. In 2016 I earned Certification in the field of Thanatology, the study of Death, Dying and Bereavement. I am honored to be able to speak on these taboo topics with knowledge, compassion, and a unique perspective. I want to sincerely thank you for following & reading the blog, I hope that this is a healing place for you.
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  • Neil

    Molly –

    Thank you for this timely blog! I have seen to many mothers experience the death of their child of all ages. It pains me to see their suffering. I will forever be marked by the death of my nephew Matthew. The pain I saw my sister Loretta & Chuck go through was horrible. I have not a clue how they have managed to continue to live through such a tragic death. Matthew’s death has had a significant impact on my life to this day. I am somewhere between joyful and paranoid with fear being a parent to Jesse.

    I agree with Doug Manning we should not judge of try and control someones grief. As you know we all grieve differently, so what ever plays out we need to respect and honor.
    Thank you again for sharing your deep insights to our families and community.

    • Neil,
      Deaths stay with us and mold how we move through life and how we treat others. It’s not surprising that you have your fears with Jesse, I think many parents do, but when you combine your experience of losing Matthew and what you do for a living where you see death daily, you live in a reality that you know death can touch at any time.

      I’m glad this blog was well received by you, thank you for reading & sharing your own experience.

      Molly

  • Tom

    Great blog, Molly

    The word “connect” resonated with me, because of our need to tell stories in way we will remember the lives we have shared with family and friends. And, our need to grieve is important to help us heal through the stories we tell each other.

    • Tom,
      That is such a powerful word and a very important one when it comes to grief. If we don’t make effort to connect with others over our common loss our experience can be so much more painful than if we share the grief we are entitled to. Thank you for reading & sharing your insight.

      Molly

  • Chuck Ricciardi

    Molly,

    We always want to make it all better for our suffering family and friends. Sometimes I actually think I can help take the pain away from a grieving person with my words and or actions. All though the words and actions may be very much appreciated, nothing takes the pain away. The mother and child bond is one of the greatest in this world and you are right, being a mother never ends, even if our children are no longer here with us.

    Watching my wonderful wife Loretta go through her first Mother’s day after our son Matthew died was a painful and brutal walk, to say the least. One gift to all those mothers that have lost a child would be to hear their childs’ name spoken aloud. That’s it, just a reminder that they are not forgotten. Mother’s remember every single day, not just on Mother’s day. Thanks Molly for sharing a wonderful thought for all those mothers that should be free to grieve and know their child is not forgotten. Happy Mother’s Day.

    Love,
    Chuck

    • Chuck,
      Thank you for sharing. I hope you will find time together as a family, or perhaps just the two of you, to remember and love Matthew. I know that people are so often afraid of saying the person’s name, worried that it will upset their grieving friend – it is so the opposite. To not have them mentioned – especially on landmark days like Mother’s Day – is just to reenforce the horrible feeling and myth we sometimes begin to believe: that they never existed.

      I so appreciate your thoughts as I know they come from true heartfelt pain and experience – yours is the life this was for & yours is the voice that also needs to be heard.

      Thank you Chuck,
      Molly

  • Anne Anderson Collins

    Molly
    I will share how Wed, the 23rd went. It was Lou’s birthday, his first in heaven. All the family gathered at my house. Lou always wanted nothing more than his family together, pizza and either chocolate cake or later, carrot cake for his birthday. In the “old days”, I make a homemade salad dressing chocolate cake, which is the moistest cake on the planet and was his favorite.
    As we were finishing our pizza and heading for the cake part, little 6 year old Elisabeth asked how many candles would we use? I said, I think we will put one since it is his first birthday in heaven. She said, after we sing Happy Birthday to him, I will blow it out for him. She said, and next year we will put two and the next year three…as she counted to 10.
    I made the suggestion that while we had our cake it would be good if anyone wanted to share a fun or special memory they enjoyed about Lou. That was easy. There were so many. Soon we were laughing at his driving, sayings, cantankerous ways and it was wonderful. Then Jessica asked if I could get out some pictures of when he was younger so her boyfriend could see them.
    We all retired to the living room and watched the musical video, “Remembering Lou” with special songs in the background, and pictures of his life, our life. Jessica paused it all throughout and we shared more stories. It ended with Annie’s Moon. So of course we told Brad how it came to be “my moon”. Brad, being the sweet, romantic young man that he is loved it all and now knows his sweetheart’s Papa Louie a bit better.
    Suffering and loss that is shared, talked about and out in the open makes it easier for everyone. Our family did that on his birthday, his special day. Just because he is no longer physically present was no reason for us to ignore the day.
    That was a large part of our healing.
    Mothers need that, too.
    Love
    Anne

    • Beautiful Anne, your experience is the absolute essence of the power of memory – it is best when shared. Remembering on our own can sometimes be very painful, but remembering together in a group looking at photos, pausing to tell stories – that is just the best.
      I’m so thrilled that you marked that landmark day with such beauty and meaning. It sounds like it was a wonderful event for your whole family.

      Thank you for sharing,
      Molly

  • Becky Finch Lomaka

    Hi Molly,

    Thank you for such a timely blog. A group of about 30 women here in Orange County gathered this past weekend for an annual “Their Mother’s Too” event. Sadly, to be a part of this group, means you have had a child die. At the gathering the message to the moms was “put self care first” which is so important in grief. Whether the therapeutic value of scented candles, massage, aromatherapy and personal training — or the outlet of creative expression and preservation of memories of those we have lost — the hope is that as they head into Mother’s Day weekend, these moms will feel the benefits of the time they spent together and the gifts they took with them.

    This will be my Mom’s first Mother’s Day without my brother; I know she will shed tears and relive the aching pain of grief that only a mother can know. My hope is she can find some moments of joy too and remember that my brother lives on in her heart.

    Becky

    • Becky,
      How wonderful that this group of mother’s has a community that they can meet with – a community that understands some of their walk and that can join together in support, encouragement, and truth.

      I will be thinking of your mom & the mixed and messy feelings that will accompany this first Mother’s Day without a precious son. I hope that she has many moments throughout the day where she can feel peace and a certainty of his presence.

      Molly

  • Mark

    Hi Molly…..Thanks for your words about Mother’s Day…..this will be my first Mother’s Day in 57 years without my Mom…..I will take your advice though and while our family will be together celebrating my nephew’s wedding…perhaps we can take a few minutes to reflect on Jean Adams…..thanks, Mark

    • Oh Mark,
      How lovely that you will already be gathering with friends & family on that special day. I hope that you do find time to remember with your brother and others the wonderful woman that was your mother. I’m sure you will all wish she was there with you to see her grandson be married and I hope you are able to feel like she’s there as you remember her.

      Molly

  • Diana Williams

    Great blog Molly! I just wanted to share this poem with anyone who has lost a Mother…

    A Mother’s Crown

    Heaven lit up with a mighty presence,
as
    the Angels all looked down.
Today the Lord was placing the jewels 
Into my
    mother’s crown.

    He held up a golden crown,
 as my
    darling mother looked on. 
He said in His gentle voice,
‘I will now explain each
    one.’

    ‘The first gem,’ He said, ‘is a Ruby,
 and
    it’s for endurance alone,
 for all the nights you waited up 
for your children to
    come home.’

    ‘For all the nights by their bedside,
you
    stayed till the fever went down.
 For nursing every little wound,
 I add this
    ruby to your crown.’

    ‘An emerald, I’ll place by the ruby,
 for
    leading your child in the right way. 
For teaching them the lessons,
That made
    them who they are today.’

    ‘For always being right there, 
through
    all life’s important events. 
I give you a sapphire stone,
 for the time and love
    you spent.’

    ‘For untying the strings that held them,
when they grew up and left home.
    
I give you this one for courage.’
Then
    the Lord added a garnet stone.

    ‘I’ll place a stone of amethyst,’ He
    said.
‘For all the times you spent on your knees,
 when you asked if I’d take
    care of your children,
 and then for having faith in Me.’

    ‘I have a pearl for every little
    sacrifice
that you made without them knowing. 
For all the times you went
    without,
 to keep them happy, healthy and growing.’

    ‘And last of all I have a diamond,
 the
    greatest one of all, 
for sharing unconditional love
 whether they were big or
    small.’

    ‘It was your love that helped them
    grow
 feeling safe and happy and proud
 A love so strong and pure 
It could shift
    the darkest cloud.’

    After the Lord placed the last jewel in,
 He said, ‘Your
    crown is now complete,
 you’ve earned your place in Heaven 
with your children at
    your feet.’

    • Beautiful Diana! I’ve never read this before, it’s such a lovely and pure image of motherhood in it’s joys and pains. Thank you so much for sharing this with me : )

      Molly

  • Michael Thomas

    What a tough subject to write on. I seem to get a pain that grows in the pit of my stomach as Mothers day and Fathers day approach, for I know every call we get is going to have that extra dose of emptiness and pain to go along with it. I love that story from Don’t Take My Grief Away From Me. It always seems to hit home and point out the perfect solution to how to let people grieve.

    Michael

    • Michael,
      I know what you mean about the pain in your stomach – as I drove around yesterday all over southern california, I watched terrible drivers race around and cut others off thinking the whole time, “be careful, no one should die on mother’s day!” – I know that may sound rather paranoid but as a mortuary employee I think all of us have that awareness of the sudden unpredictability of death. We know that it doesn’t stop for holidays and that many have lost mothers and children on this significant day.

      Thank you for reading & sharing how you feel about these holidays as they approach, I think it’s a level of awareness that is very important and compassionate.

      Molly

  • Shasta Cola

    What a nice blog, Molly. It’s important to acknowledge the Mothers who are going through grief during Mother’s Day. I know all holidays are pretty intensely painful for people who have lost someone important to them, but I can’t imagine Mother’s Day for a mom who lost a child. I know for my own mom, it doesn’t matter that there are 6 other living children, she misses my brother and that looks very painful. It saddens me to think of all the families I have met going through grief that will have to experience these days without their loved ones. I can only hope that we have some part in that healing and make it slightly a little bit easier for them.

    • Shasta,
      You have such a unique vantage point on this important day. I’ve heard of people trying to console grieving mothers by pointing out that they have other children but as you mentioned, these other children do not somehow comprise and fill the gap of the child that is not there. Yes, these children are wonderful blessings and huge reasons to celebrate and be celebrated, but to think that that gap can be “plugged” by others is a horrible idea to impose on someone. I hope your mom always feels the freedom to grieve and remember on mother’s day her son who is not there.

      Thank you again for sharing this Shasta, your perspective is powerful and your insight is wonderful,

      Molly

  • Fitz

    Touching blog, Molly. Mother’s Day has been bitter sweet. My mother died when she was 51. Still hard to believe now that I have passed that age myself. I remember thinking at the time of her death that she had lived a full life at 51. Wow! Not even close. I’ll be blessed this mother’s day with spending it with my family at Jack’s graduation at NAU and celebrating a great family milestone. We will certainly toast my mom along with toasting my wife and my mother in law. Cheers and Blessing all around!
    Thanks,
    Fitz

    • Fitz,
      I can’t imagine how Mother’s Day has changed for you & the mix of feelings that the day brings. It’s wonderful that you were able to be together for such a special event with Jack and also celebrate your wife & remember your own mom. I hope you were able to feel like you honored her in that day, I’m sure she would have loved to have been there.

      Thank you so much for sharing your side of Mother’s Day,

      Molly

  • Jenn

    Mother’s day is meant to celebrate all mothers, and even those who are no longer with us on this earth. I hope this blog can help those who are in remembrance of their mothers celebrate theirs lives and think of memories that put smiles on their faces.

    • Yes, Jenn that was my hope as well. Thank you for echoing that sentiment & for being someone who values all people whether they are physically with us or not.

      Molly

  • Carrie Bayer

    Molly, what a powerful blog. I’m in tears because it so perfectly expresses how I feel. Mother’s Day is tough for me because i’m so far away from my mother & because of my personal losses. There’s no “Almost A Mother Day” & no cards of such. I’m so grateful for Steve, today he brought me lunch at work & a bouquet of 6 long-stemmed red roses w/ 1 sunflower in the middle- a symbolic mother’s day gift for me. Thank you so much for this blog- it is truly amazing. XOXOX Carrie

    • Carrie,
      How beautiful – those flowers were such a meaningful gift, well done Steve.

      Your story is one of the ones I took into account as I put this blog together. The more I am exposed to the true stories and pain of others lives the more I realize what an insensitive world we live in. It’s not that I think it’s on purpose and obviously there’s nothing bad in celebrating these roles, but we should be mindful that there is pain for so many and make time in our celebrations to pause, remember, and make the holiday that much more meaningful.

      I hope you felt celebrated by Steve as you should be – I hope you continue to have meaningful Mother’s Days and share your story to those who have hearts to hear of your lost loves.

      Love you, thank you so very much for sharing,

      Molly

  • Elsa

    Molly,
    What a great blog for such a great holiday. Mother’s day is such a special time whether you are a mother or a child celebrating with a mother. Although we are thankful everyday for the special things a mother does, it still is very important to take the time on aEls day such as mother’s day to be especially thankful.
    Thank You ,
    Elsa

    • Thank you for reading Elsa, I hope it gave you some extra time to think about your mom and the blessing she has been to you. So glad you enjoyed the blog!

      Molly

  • Lori

    Molly,
    Thank you for this reminder for those of us who struggle with certain holidays. We, as a culture, do not do grief well. We want to fix people. We want things to go back to “normal”. We don’t know what to say and get very uncomfortable. Rather than delve into the necessary uncomfortable, we try to put a Band-Aid on it and move on. As we have learned, it does the person who is grieving and those caring for them a much greater service to spend time remembering instead of trying to rush past the grief.
    Love,
    Lori

    • Yes, so well said Lori. “Remember, don’t rush” – could be our new mantra I think.

      Thank you for sharing your perspective, it’s right on.

      Molly

  • Patricia Kolstad

    Molly . . thank you for digging deeper than most in honoring the grief of Mothers everywhere. I found this tribute on Dottie Urke’s FB page yesterday and felt it was appropriate to share here, hoping that other folks would take a moment to open their hearts to your blog. It’s from Amy Young’s blog of 2013. I’ve never read her blogs before, but found this to be most heartwarming.

    To those who gave birth this year to their first child – we celebrate you. To those who lost a child this year – we mourn with you. To those who are in the trenches with little ones every day and wear the badge of food stains – we appreciate you. To those who experience loss this year through miscarriage, failed adoptions, or running away – we mourn with you. To those who walk the hard path of infertility, fraught with pokes, prods, tears, and disappointment – we walk with you. Forgive us when we say foolish things. We don’t mean to make this harder than it is. To those who are foster moms, mentor moms, and spiritual moms – we need you. To those who have warm and close relationships with your children – we celebrate you. To those who have disappointment, heartache, and distance with your children – we sit with you. To those who experience abuse at the hands of your own mother – we acknowledge your experience. To those who lived through driving tests, medical tests, and the overall testing of motherhood – we are better for having you in our midst. To those who will have emptier nests in the upcoming year – we grieve and rejoice with you. To those who are pregnant with new life, both expected and surprising -we anticipate with you. This Mother’s Day and everyday thereafter, we walk with you. Mothering is not for the faint of heart and we have real warriors in our midst. We remember you!

    This is one that I added, Molly, because Kristen mentioned that there are Mom’s with special needs kids weren’t mentioned . . .
    “And, to those Moms with kids that are “differently abled” – I extend more understanding, more patience, and more hope for the future.”

    Thanks again for taking the time to acknowledge Mom’s!
    Love . . AP

    • Just beautiful! Thank you so much for sharing this. It’s so hard to capture the scope of motherhood in a post and to do justice to all the types of mothering that go on in this world. I even think of the mentors in my life that have at times guided me as mother’s do … you being one of them : ) … and I feel overwhelmed with joy and pain over the multitude of hearts swollen with the chaotic mass of feelings that mother’s day can summon.

      This blog that you shared does a beautiful job, so wonderful to read. Thank you again for putting this up!

      Molly

  • Kari Lyn Leslie

    Molly,
    Thanks for sharing this piece from Doug Mannings book. I have been around grieving mother’s who seemed at peace and composed, and when I read this, I completely embraced it. Though I envy women whose faith and composure are strong and solid, I believe I would crumble like a cookie if anything ever happened to one of my kids. What a blessing to know grief is very personal, and we don’t have to behave in “the right” way. Our grief is our own, and we can embrace it any way we desire. It’s also very helpful as an observer of someone else’s grief, to let them have their tears, anger, solitude, wailing, the list goes on and on.
    Great job,
    kari

    • Kari,
      I love how you picked out two lessons from this passage; the first one being the more obvious one to me, that we all grieve differently. While it is obvious once it’s stated, it’s very hard to accept and for many people, very hard to allow for themselves. We all like to follow our role models because it gives us a sense of “how it should be” and control but grief is a symptom of being out of control and therefore shouldn’t be handled as formulaic.
      The second lesson you point out (and this is my favorite) is how we are to act as observers of grief. It is easy when we are not participants to think critical thoughts about others actions, to want to cater to our own discomfort over their extreme pain. We naturally think of ourselves first and also somehow believe that if we can get them to stop crying it means they aren’t sad any more – it’s crazy but it’s true.

      I’m going to be mulling that latter part over some more, I love that you pointed it out to me & pulled out yet another important moral from Doug’s stories.

      Thank you : )
      Molly

  • Christopher Iverson

    Molly,
    I was amazed thinking that this was my mother’s 57th Mother’s Day. Wow! She has lived in Texas for the past 14 years and I haven’t had the opportunity to take her to brunch or walk along the beach chatting about life. I did enjoy three weeks in Italy and Switzerland with her last summer and realized how much I do enjoy spending time with her . After her death, it will be challenging not having her available for chats and emails. I’ve had her for 55 years…55 Mother’s Days. I have been blessed.

    • Wow Chris, I love the perspective on how long you mom has been a mom. What a sweet way to look at her achievements. I hope that one of these years you find yourself with her on Mother’s Day and able to treat her to a favorite walk or restaurant. I know that taking trips with your mom has been a huge source of joy in your life and I think you BOTH are so fortunate to have such a loving and compatible relationship.

      Thank you for sharing about her,

      Molly

  • Stacy

    Beautiful blog Molly. I definitely cannot imagine the feelings felt by a mother who has lost a child or a child losing their mother. I can relate to this because my mother had a miscarriage 12 years ago and ’till this day she always includes my baby brother in our lives. “He would have been…” is always things she says. A mother is always a mother even if the child is not physically present, very true. Every Mother’s Day my sisters and I spoil mom and although she will always grieve the loss of her baby boy we are there to support her even with just a kiss and a hug. A void so great can never be filled but I can tell by her smile and loving ways that we make it easier for her in some way. shape or form. I also think about 2 other mom’s that I have had the privilege to console through their grief of the death of their child; such a difficult time of their lives. I like making a difference for other families that are experiencing what my family experienced through the loss of my baby brother because it’s that much more personal. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and views on this matter Molly. Grieving is crucial for the healing of a broken heart.

  • Amy

    Molly,
    Great Blog. We often forget that once a mother always a mother. Just cause there gone doesn’t erase our title. This Mother’s Day was especially painful for myself and my family. Having lost my dad just 11 days ago and this being our first holiday without him. However we did reflect on what he had given to us over the years and how special he always made us feel on this special day. Thanks for sharing Doug Mannings story, he always has such amazing stories that really allow us to reflect and heal.
    Amy

  • Jeff Turner

    Molly,
    One of the most difficult aspects of our profession is being present first hand with families as they face the “more complicated” (if there is such a thing) circumstances surrounding death. For me it has been the deaths where a young child is affected by the death of a parent or the other way around.

    I have watched parents dress their child, hold their infant, weep at the casket unable to leave the graveside. I have had to walk out of rooms where significant sacred moments like these are taking place because my own tears cannot be stayed. I have been witness to children standing on tip-toes to look into the casket of their lifeless mom or dad and wonder how they can bear the pain, questions, uncertainty and shattered future.

    I watch and pray, helpless but not hopeless. Many around me have experienced these kinds of life altering earthquakes of loss and yet have navigated the pain. They have found ways to endure and overcome and yet they can still feel the sting of those first moments when they stepped over the threshold death took them through and look back with a different perspective that continues to evolve but never goes away.

    My heart breaks for these seemingly sadder circumstances where life is cut short. Expectations of the future seasons of life that most of us assume we will have and enjoy without fear or thought of suddenly ending do not cross our conscious mind except when it strikes close to home.

    Thank you for the reminder to pray for the moms, kids, family and friends who have paths to walk that we would all want to avoid.

    Blessings,

    Jeff Turner

  • Shayna Mallik

    Wow Molly what a great and inspirational blog! It is so true I think we sometimes get busy in our day to day activities and forget once a mother always a mother. Just like once a daughter/son always a daughter/son. Mother’s day is always such a special day for me because I get to celebrate my mom, who is just amazing and so caring! I always give my mom thanks on a day to day basis for all that she does but o Mother’s Day it is even more special because it is a day dedicated to her! Again that you for such a great blog about this great holiday!

    Shayna

  • Lauren

    Thanks so much for sharing this story! Over the years Mother’s Day has been easier and it has become a time to reflect and share stories. Your words are comforting to those who have lost their mom and thank you for reminding us to celebrate them!

  • Rosemary

    Thank you, Molly, for sharing this blog! Mother’s Day can be a good time to celebrate the unique mother-child relationship, and yet it may be very painful for so many people who have lost a mother or a child. I love your suggestions for recognizing the loss and for celebrating the good times and memories. Your ideas can give us an opportunity to find comfort and healing on what could have been a very difficult day.

  • Erin Fodor

    This mother’s day was pretty rough for my family. My brother was in a serious automobile accident early last Tuesday morning. He is recovering well, we as a family are just going through the repercussions. I received the call that morning, and then had to tell my mother, so we could head to the emergency room. I have not seen my mother that much of a wreck since we found out my father had been killed in an accident years prior. So this mother’s day we were very thankful yet reminded of just how fast your life can be changed forever. And to answer your second question Molly, Every year at father’s day, his birthday, and the anniversary of his death, I try to make it to some form of large body of water since my fathers ashes are scattered at sea; and let off a balloon with a message for him. Thanks for the wonderful blog.
    -Erin

  • Joe Lavoie

    Molly
    This is a tough time for me and my family as this was the first mothers day spent in a care facility with my mom who is ill the mood of my brothers and sisters is not what you would normally have , however we all told our mom we love her even if she could not respond verbally back to us you could see it in her eyes . Since I was away that day I was on the phone and julie my sister said mom blinked her eyes when she heard my voice just the fact that she is still with us for this time I am considered blessed and will remember this time forever. Thanks so much again for sharing.
    sincerely Joe Lavoie