What is Your One Word?

It’s important to me that our discussions about death not preclude life. We talk so much about grief and pain here that it’s really nice (for me, anyway) to take a break and think about and evaluate the life I … Continue reading

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Talking with the Dead

I have learned so much from grieving people and I continue to be amazed at the creative, meaningful, and symbolic rituals they take on in the journey of missing their loved one. Recently, I came across a story deeply grabbed … Continue reading

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Why We Should All Celebrate The Day of the Dead

Why we should all celebrate the day of the dead // What do you do throughout the year to honor people in your family who have died? Do you mark their birthday? Deathiversary (yes, that’s a thing)? Do you gather … Continue reading

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The Compounded Grief of Premature Deaths

There are no easy deaths – there are no situations where the grief experience isn’t difficult, complex, and sad. That said, there is a generally accepted threshold where lives are deemed as having been “lived, good and long.” When 90 … Continue reading

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My Favorite Advice About Time

I recently finished a podcast called S-Town that featured the true & tragic story John B. McLemore, an astoundingly brilliant horologist – that is, someone who has studied time. The narrator and John begin to discuss sundials together and I … Continue reading

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If Your Father has Died, If You are a Grieving Father … The Shadow Side of Father’s Day

Dads. They’ve got their own unique hold on each and every one of us. With Father’s Day on the horizon, I am always drawn to thinking of the people whose voices will struggle on this holiday with what to say. … Continue reading

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If Your Mom has Died, If Your Child has Died … The Shadow Side of Mother’s Day

This post isn’t to take away from the joy of those celebrating or being celebrated this Mother’s Day – go for it, enjoy and make the most of your time with the people you love. But for those of you … Continue reading

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Stop Saying, “This happened for a reason.” A De-Bunking of Christian Narratives on Death

Ok, so I am going to get slightly religious in this post – it’s a necessity in this case and it’s no big deal. I try to remain neutral in my writing but I feel this topic calls for a bit … Continue reading

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Stop Saying “Don’t Give Up.” Please.

We say a lot of things to grieving people that under normal circumstances would be fine, hopefully even encouraging, but to people facing a life or death situation, a trauma, shock or loss, these can be the most backward and … Continue reading

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Transforming Painful Days into New Traditions

A Table for 1 on Valentine’s Day Holidays/birthdays/anniversaries … there is always one of these days looming around the corner it seems when we are in the throws of grief. Days that used to hold so much joy and fun and now … Continue reading

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